Ladies and Gentlemen, I Give You Victoria Jackson

From VictoriaJackson.com via Dispatches from the Culture Wars,  I present to you all the words of either the most brilliant Poe in modern day America or the craziest person to ever play a ukulele, Victoria Jackson!

Suddenly, the gym CNN is blasting a story of how a homosexual man is helping other homosexuals adopt children. He speaks about the personal, passionate sacrifice of his time for this cause as if he were Mother Theresa. I’m appalled. Homosexuals-adopting-children is child abuse. No, it’s pedophilia and sexual molestation. Teaching a young mind, a clean slate, an innocent soul that homosexuality is a natural, normal and moral lifestyle is evil. How is gay adoption different from the recently jailed Penn State Jerry Sandusky, child molester case?

Wait, what?

With all the TV shows, Modern Family, Glee, etc., and today’s Huff Po video of straight guys kissing at Chick Fil A “to make a statement,” I’m getting really tired of the topic. And then, my husband tells me an Army Brigadiere General brought her wife to her promotion ceremony at Arlington National Cemetery! What?! A wife can’t have a wife?! Who’s the insane person here? Is this a Twilight Zone episode?

Silly homosexuals.  Wives are for guys.  “Who’s the insane person here?”  I love it when people answer their own questions.

Oh, did you know that CNN is the propaganda wing of the Democratic party?  And CNN also claims that Obama has a 99% approval rating?

At the gym today, I plugged my ear phones into the state-of-the-art-Elliptical machine and the only news channel out of the 23 TV’s hanging from the ceiling, was CNN. So, I watched the enemy. It’s fun to see how they distort things, to watch their blatant propaganda. I’m sure some CNNies don’t know they are propagandists. They were the kids in high school who copied the captain of the cheerleader’s hairdo without asking questions. 12″ beehive. 12″ beehive. Side bangs in your eye. Side bangs in your eye. No questions asked. They are pod people. They have no soul, so they copy whatever they believe is the “in” thing. Some of the CNNies know they are brainwashing the ignorant masses.

…..

CNN says, “The Emperor is a “Christian”, he has a 99% approval rating, and gay people are heroes!”

I say, ” Only 50% like him- the 50% he supports financially, and CNN is the propaganda arm of O’s communist regime.”

Hmmm.  This rant needs a martyr complex, don’t you think?

The people and CNN spit on me and walk away. I see a few faces across the street with spit on their faces. I am not alone.

Victoria?  People aren’t spitting on you on purpose, they are just doing spit-takes over the batshit insanity that comes out of your mouth

Jane Lynch just announced publicly, “F**K Chick Fil-A!” I publicly stood up for Chick-Fil-A, and I don’t use the F word.  Jane believes her morals are just and loving. I believe my morals are just and loving.  We can’t both be right.

The lines are clearly drawn. Which side are you on? Or, are you one of those people who say nothing and sit on the fence, the “moderate,” the lukewarm? Jesus said in Rev. 3:15, “So then, because you are lukewarm, and neither cold nor hot, I vomit you out of My mouth.” Pastors who preach nothing.  People who won’t put a sign in their yard, or a bumper sticker on their car. Christians who don’t vote.

Victoria Jackson, everyone.  Stark raving mad or the creator of a long term performance art political satire?  I report, you decide!

Remember, from the RationalWiki:

Poe’s Law states:[1]

Without a winking smiley or other blatant display of humor, it is impossible to create a parody of Fundamentalism that SOMEONE won’t mistake for the real thing.

Poe’s Law is an axiom suggesting that it’s difficult, if not impossible, to distinguish between parodies of religious or other fundamentalism and its genuine proponents, since they both seem equally insane. For example, some conservatives consider noted homophobeFred Phelps to be so over-the-top that they argue he’s a “deep cover liberal” trying to discredit more mainstream homophobes.

…….

Be back after work tonight with some more Foster Disbelief Goodness!

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