Cue The Violins!

Men’s Rights Advocate, ahem,”Ian Ironwood”  (seriously!!!) is feeling a bit damaged, my friends.  You see, many years ago Marlo Thomas wrote a feminist book titled Free To Be…You and Me and this book totally had it out for Mr. Ironwood.  Let’s travel to the Wonkette for this tragic story:

This particular blogger, “Ian Ironwood” (really!!), has an impassioned story about how he was irreversably damaged and bullied by the anti-man propaganda of Marlo Thomas’s Free To Be…You and Me:

I take issue with the program because it was loaded with anti-masculine imagery and took the approach that, basically, all things patriarchal were evil and oppressive, and all things feminist were inherently good. It told me, in other words, that I was Free To Be pretty much anything in the world I wanted . . . except a masculine Man.

You can be a doctor, a lawyer, a firefighter, an astronaut, even Zandal, level 90 Orc Monk, but a masculine Man?  Sorry.  Damn, this is one powerful book.  Single-handedly able to remove Magnum, P.I. from the television landscape and forbid everyone with a Y chromosome from becoming “masculine!”  We must send war correspondents immediately, starting with attachments to all the male professional sports teams, to find out how these men cope with the inability to be “masculine.”

Free To Be You And Me fucked me up. Bad. It taught me that it WAS NOT OKAY to be a “boy”, that MEN were universally overbearing and insensitive jerks whose only role was to dictate and oppress, and that my ONLY HOPE for moral and social acceptance in this brave new plastic world was to hand my testicles over to Marlo and forget I ever had them.

I don’t know about men on a whole, Ian, but you certainly seem a bit overbearing and are quite possibly an insensitive jerk.  Dictating and oppressing?  I’m sure those are on your list of personality traits as well.  Lesson well learned, Mr. Ironwood.\

Thanks to FTBYAM and its clones, adherents, and attitudes, I and thousands of boys like me were institutionally bullied by feminists throughout our childhoods. Our schools and our teachers were working with the intention of removing the dangerous “masculine” characteristics that might interfere in the feminist paradigm — say, like getting married and wanting your wife to stay at home with the kids, or pursuing a “typical” and “traditional” male career path that might block some enterprising young woman from having that job. FTBYAM epitomized feminism’s subtextual message to men: YOU ARE USELESS AND EVIL AND IN OUR WAY.

I must of stayed home sick for that day of school.  Or maybe I just repressed the memory!  Oh nos!  The humanity!  Then again, maybe Ian Ironwood just has a weak grasp on the meaning of everyday words.  Take his reaction to accusations of Republican leaning political feelings:

I’m a Progressive, moron. I’m a firm believer in Humanism. Feminism, not so much.

Progressive?  Humanism?  I do not believe you firmly grasp the meanings of the words that are coming out of your mouth.

But still, take a moment today of silence for claimed porn star, Ian Ironwood, victim of the War on Men.


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