Will Someone Please Ask Abigail Breslin Where She Parks Her Unicorn, and If Fairies Really Have Wings?

Yeah, I’m being mean to a seventeen year old.  I am horrible.

But when I was seventeen I believed in shit like this as well, and wish that people would have told me I was being an idiot, rather than smiling and nodding their heads while I explained that I was a witch who was going ghost hunting.

From…ugh.  Fox News:

“We did have two weird things happen when we were doing the scene with the Ouija board, it didn’t move on its own, but when we shot this scene in the attic, I got this weird asthma attack, which was so random. I don’t have asthma, so it was so random,” Breslin told FOX411. “Another time, I wrapped for the day and went back to the place I was staying and went to run on the treadmill at the gym and the door was wide open and had a stopper on it, yet it randomly slammed shut and then my workout for the day was done. I was terrified.”

OMG, OMG, OMG!  Are you fucking kidding me?  A door slammed under “mysterious” circumstances?  Fascinating!  And while shooting a scene in a tight, enclosed space that was probably crowded with production team members and more than likely overheated (and just to stop it here, I don’t care if it was overheated or not, that was just one of a million possible factors that could have caused a 17 year old with a heavy work schedule to have a “asthma” attack), you had a breathing related incident like an asthma attack?  Un-fucking-believable!

Strange.  You know, I wonder why she thinks these incidents are “weird.”

It turns out elements of the supernatural have long intrigued the young star, even before stepping into the thriller genre.

“(I’m fascinated) with ghosts and other worldly, paranormal things. I have always wanted to see a ghost or go on one of those Syfy channel shows talking about it,” she said. “I want to meet the Long Island Medium to see if she can see if anyone follows me. I want to know if anyone is trying to contact me. I would be sad if I went to her and she told me no one was contacting me.”

Huh.  She was already interested in the supernatural.  Never would have guessed that.  Don’t worry, Abigail.  I am willing to guarantee that the Long Island con artist Medium would say someone is trying to contact you.  Probably a whole lot of someones.  As many someones as you want.

Anyone want to start a pool on how long it takes the Long Island Faker Medium to see ratings gold and reach out to Abigail about appearing on Long Island Grifter Medium?

My guess is the second the Long Island Cold Reader Medium heard about this interview.

One thought on “Will Someone Please Ask Abigail Breslin Where She Parks Her Unicorn, and If Fairies Really Have Wings?

  1. Wow, I just thought it was generally accepted in youth when you play with a ouiji board that someone messes about. I mean, ghost stories are fun, right?
    Guilty disclosure: I was the one messing about! LOL
    Granted, I’ve only been involved in a few instances in my youth where we did anything of the sort. Mostly it was just scary stories around the fire at girl scout camp and such.

    But you bring up a good point, and I’m sorry now that maybe I should’ve pressed some of my friends, in my youth, to find out if they really believed this stuff, and to what degree.
    You don’t want to get into some kind of an argument with your friends when you’re young maybe?

    When I was in my early-mid 20s, I lived in an apartment where there was an odd trick of the light that would happen & make it look like, out of the corner of your eye, that the front door to the hallway was opening up with someone walking through. Or that someone was walking out of the closet (which was right next to the other door).
    I’m assuming it had something to do with headlights coming from a college campus parking lot on the other side of a lawn across the street. Coupled with that corner-of-the-eye movement phenomenon where your brain tries to make sense of something it’s not actually focused on… ? It only happened at night, and only if the living room was very dimly lit.
    At any rate, I saw this several times over the few years that I lived there, and it would always give me a start because I’d think someone was walking into my place unannounced! In that split second, I would always think – uh-oh did I forget to lock the door??
    One night when it happened to my (new) roommate, it really spooked her!
    Among my friends, several people who experienced this, it became known, as “the closet man ghost”… or just closet-man.
    Since that experience, it’s easy for me to see how people can interpret stuff like this with a supernatural explanation. It’s almost natural to go that route. :/
    I have to admit to teasing easily unsettled friends. But I always did insist that it was a trick of the light from outside headlights. Not my fault if it wasn’t accepted as a convincing explanation!

    I always wanted to test it. I had tried to convince groups of friends to figure out a way to test it, by having someone go drive around in that parking lot, with at least 2 people looking in different directions in the living room, to see if we could purposely reproduce the effect. But nobody was ever game. *sigh* It seemed like a lot of trouble of course, because this was before video cameras were ubiquitous, and none of us had cell phones at that time. I had just one friend who used her parents’ car that had a “car phone” in it, and she didn’t use the car phone except to call them.

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